No, seriously. What’s the difference? I can’t tell. I’ve been extremely emotional these last few weeks. A lot of it had to do with the anniversary of Aunt Terry’s passing. Some of it had to do with a little girl named Ava’s 10th birthday. I don’t know her personally, but I’ve read her mother’s blog for years, so I felt like I knew her. She passed away on February 5 of 2007. She got curious and got into her parents car and the heat overcame her and she passed away from heat exhaustion. She was a gorgeous little girl. I really don’t know why I’ve been so emotional. Could it be that my SIL is being a bridezilla bitch? Now she doesn’t want anyone but her to walk down the aisle with their father. She annoys the fuck out of me. Another part of it could be my grandparents splitting up. Another part could be knowing that my aunt and uncle are moving to Missouri eventually… and of course that means they’re taking Bug with them. I really don’t know what I’d do without that little girl… She makes my life better. I don’t know what it is about her, but something about her makes me a better person. I’m tearing up just writing this. I think another part of it is that I’m actually lonely. Everyone around me has a significant other. I have… no one. No love interests. I want kids some day. Some day soon. I don’t even have a boyfriend. And even if I get a boyfriend, I still don’t know if I’ll be able to have kids because my period is so irregular… I go months without it and weeks with it. Kids is a BIG deal for me. I don’t care about getting married, but I want kids. Biological kids. I don’t want to adopt. I want kids of my own. I’ve just been reflecting on sad stuff and I don’t know why. It’s bothering me… I feel like I have no one to talk to, even though I have my best friend and my sister. Okay, I know this is an unfinished post, but I’m crying. Again. So I’m just gonna leave you with this link to Sheye Rosemeyer’s blog and the story of her superprincess. And this postcard. PLEASE watch your children carefully. Please lock your car doors and don’t let your kids have the keys. And try to park it in the shade.
The Little Things 